G48: God For Eternity / God For Eight! Reflecting on David and the Divine Interrupt!

The last few days have been challenging. It’s in my own mind, as I process my perception of my current situation while old feelings of inadequacy bubble to the surface. These old trauma feelings have come up before when I push myself beyond my comfort zone, wanting to make a big change in my life. I forget that I have help if I’d just be patient. The more I try to control the outcome, the more I squeeze out my connection with the Divine.  Then it’s all me, baby! This is where things go south pretty quick. I’m not listening to them, and I start to see things in an all or nothing, black or white view. I can’t see the forest for the trees anymore, and I begin to believe everything is difficult. I’m just getting in my own way. Things could flow and be wonderful, enfolding in perfect timing when I am willing to let it go.

I’m looking for land, and for a less expensive living situation than the one I’m in now, in the hopes of saving more money and building a dome house. I really want a dome house!  I have funds, and enough passive income to live reasonably comfortable, but I’m viewing what I have as a limited resource rather than being in a state of gratitude for my abundance. I made a smaller budget for the land so I can put more of my money into the house construction. But the lots are small, too rural, unbuildable, or in a subdivision that wouldn’t allow that type of build.  My plan started out as a great project that I was really excited about. Then it brought up feelings of inadequacy and lack that kind of took over the once fun project.  I was left full of fear of a future that was so full of promise and excitement. What the heck happened? The “devil” is in the details. Overthinking leads to feeling overwhelmed, then nothing happens till we get out of the quagmire. I forget that They are with me.

I wrote those two paragraphs a couple of weeks ago to help get me centered. I have to go inward and be in the moment. That’s all I have. They told me that the most effective words you can speak are God-is- Everything-to-Me!  Speak them slowly, they said. When I did, I could feel the energy pulse through my body. It was a tingly, giddy, warm sensation, and I felt deep love and connection as I focused and set my intention on each word as I uttered them.  God IS everything to me. All of this stuff that we think is reality, it’s not so important. It is just matter. The Universe is all energy, frequency, sound, vibration, thought; Love. This lifetime seems long, but in Divine timing, it’s about as long as a blink. We are eternal. We are only here for a moment. Then we go Home. The people in our lives, all actors in an amazingly intertwined, complex and connected play. Every one of us has a purpose and most of the time we have no clue what that might be. Only when we go home will we know what the full purpose might have been. Hopefully, likely unknowingly, we would have lived out that purpose when we were here.  For those of us who are grieving the loss of a loved one, take heart. You’ll only be here for a little while and you’ll be back Home with them. I’ll share more on this further in my writing.

I have a better idea, but still not totally clear about my purpose.  They told us that we don’t have as much free will as we think we do. They never clarified that in enough detail that would have satisfied me. I guess we have certain milestones in our lives that must happen; and will. In between the lines, we have the freedom to choose. They will give us an overwhelming desire to do something, the intensity of which will be determined by the necessity of that action. This is how they move us. We still have the free will to resist if we want to, so to a point we are still in control. But if it must happen, it would be incredibly hard to resist.  We have the capacity to live a life of love and compassion. Many people regularly choose the opposite.  It behooves us to learn to feel God from inside, to understand how that inner guidance feels so we can grow closer toward an ideal existence. This would be Heaven on Earth.

David, the love of my life, husband and partner for almost twelve years, went Home in December 2020. He channeled Them for eight years up until his transition. They told us they were Divine beings that stay with us from birth until we transition home. Sometimes David called them Holy Spirit, sometimes his People, and sometimes Evil Demon Spirit, if they really pissed him off. That might sound a bit confusing, so let me explain. David had some deep unexpressed anger that he battled with. He wasn’t cruel toward others and with little exception would not say anything that might be hurtful no matter how bad someone deserved it. He was a kind and loving man with many devoted friends. One would never know he was struggling with anger under the surface. This is what Holy Spirit was helping him work through by giving him situations that got him fired up. He didn’t express anger outwardly, except for occasionally cussing at Them. I often chuckled, because I knew they were helping him, it was out of love, and that everything was okay. Everything always is okay.

I wasn’t excluded from the program. I try to be kind, and do my best for others, but my challenged upbringing left me with my own anger issues, and a lot of detachment. They worked on my anger as well, having moments when I just wanted to scream at them (at David); until I surrendered and let it go. They soothed me afterwards as only They could do. No human would have been able to pull this off.  They got me over a deep hatred toward my ex-husband. I can’t say I feel love for him, but I’m not attached to any negative emotion either. I’m totally free of that relationship.

We all have our own team, our own Holy Spirit. Call them what you want, it doesn’t matter. Just acknowledge them. For a while, I called them ATI, All That Is, but I mostly call them My People or Holy Spirit, like I was used to with David’s people. They are part of that God consciousness, like we are, only they’re not viewing things from a lower vibration. We are more like them when we’re Home. While we’re here, we’re in 3D living through our five senses, believing the physical, material world is true reality and all there is in the Universe. I can’t imagine anyone believing Earth is the only place that contains intelligent life. I guess it depends on how into the contrast experience you want to be.  We’re all in a collective creation of thought moving material matter, always creating, changing, expanding. God lives through us, the Universe expands through us. We have help. Our Team is with us, ready to interact with us. We asked Holy Spirit; why did you choose to talk with us?  They said that they try to talk with everyone. We were the rare ones that actually listened, and an even rarer opportunity that we were both listening. 

There were times when David thought he was delusional. He considered that perhaps he was simply having a mental breakdown and none of this was real. The logical brain wants to argue against this channeling and tell you it’s not real. I get it! But I also knew that I had been talking with my own People for many years, asking for advice, when to lock in interest rates when I was in the mortgage business, and I would often hear them talk to me just for fun or to make me laugh. The year I finally left Jupiter, Florida and moved to Nashville with my four-year-old son, my consciousness was wide open. I believed anything was possible, and the most amazing things happened, until I got scared and began to believe in my own limitations. I gave a lot of my power away to my narcissistic second husband; thus the anger. Thankfully, my People continued to talk to me, even louder as I was sinking into anger, resentment, and despair. I finally couldn’t stand the feeling of separation from God any longer and I left with my son. That said, I knew They were real. I knew David wasn’t delusional, and I trusted them. I was amazed at what they would do and share with us, and especially that they had a real voice through David. They weren’t my People, but David’s, something they reminded me when I’d ask them more personal questions about me, like about my diet and such. I had connected with mine early in the process with David and was able to channel vocally for a few weeks, till I stopped to focus more on work. They are incredibly clever and so funny!  We had such a great time with them, both of our spirit teams playing off of each other. The last year that David was with me physically, he kept asking his People when I would channel again. They would always just say soon. I didn’t ask for clarification; is that soon in earth time or soon in your time? Soon is a relative concept.

I began writing a manuscript early in 2021 about what happened. I wanted to get everything down so I didn’t forget. I figured they’d help me remember when the time came, but I didn’t want to take any chances. I interviewed some of David’s friends and family to get their perspective on David, and to find out about his past, when he was a young, active, functioning, alcoholic. He never really shared this with me. Much of his past came up with his People. David didn’t filter the information as it came through. I rewrote the manuscript several times and convinced myself that it wasn’t any good, or that no one cares, or would believe my story. I listen to other people share their experiences online and I would get bits and pieces of similarity, but nothing to the extent that David and I had shared together. I don’t have an ending. It didn’t end when David passed. David became a bigger part of the story. I guess the ending to any story is when we leave the planet. I sometimes walk in a nearby cemetery and I see all of those graves as stories; often untold lives that had been played out here till the actors were done and went home to talk about what they did while they were here. I imagine much lightheartedness and laughing at how seriously we took everything here. This perspective helped me when David passed. That and the clever ways he showed me he was still around. My best friend told me this morning that our story needs to be shared, and she suggested I get it out in pieces on the blog. Not too overwhelming, and at least it’s getting shared. She’s right. If I get encouraging feedback, it will help me continue with the story. There’s so much more to tell. Thanks for taking the time to read.

G48 – The first picture in this post is of a tiny plastic piece that I found lying in the weeds and dirt when I was heading back from the horse barn a year after David passed. It’s about half the size of a dime. I have to wonder, how did it get there, and what caused me to look down at that very moment to see it? I had it for a while before it hit me; G48 – God for Eternity, God for the eight years David channeled. Could it be a reminder that both interpretations are true?