If You Want To Solve A Problem, Try Letting It Go!

If You Want to Solve a Problem, Try Letting It Go!

I remember how excited I was, back in my late twenties, when I discovered metaphysics. At that time, I had found myself married to an alcoholic/addict. I learned what it felt like to hit rock bottom, and I surrendered to God. I had no idea how I had gotten myself in such a predicament, but these metaphysical books I found had given me some hope, and some insight. I read anything from A Course In Miracles, The Road Less Traveled to Life After Life, and any miracle, NDE or angel book I could find. There was a divine energy out there, what we call God, and I did everything I knew to do to connect to it. I was becoming immersed in my own inner journey, and I thought, boy, I’m really gonna know something in about twenty years!  I’m not quite sure where that thought came from, but I knew in my heart that I had more life experiences to go through before I would reach a more complete understanding.

It was twenty years later that I met David, and everything changed. I gained an understanding of myself that I didn’t have before. He was patient and a couple of years after we married, he suggested I work the Twelve Step program with him. I wrote more about the program in other posts, so I’ll leave that with you to discover if you’re interested. The gist of the program is to look at your life, identify your character defects, admit them to God and another human being, and let them go. A follow-up step directs us to continue to take personal inventory, and if we don’t have this in the proper perspective, we, to borrow a phrase from Stuart Smalley, end up shoulding all over ourselves.

Oftentimes, it’s not the problem that’s the problem, it’s how we are looking at it. Our brains want to keep us focused in the problem, but if we can come at it from another perspective, or leave it alone altogether, the solution will show itself or the perceived problem may go away on its own. Often the solution is simple and obvious, but we couldn’t see it from being buried in all the possible negative outcomes. This doesn’t just happen with our own problems, but we sometimes believe we must solve other people’s problems as well, adding to the stress we may already be feeling. It’s overwhelming and exhausting.

Here’s a few tips and tricks on solving problems:

1. Is the problem yours, or someone else’s? If it’s someone else’s, let them figure it out. If you believe you need to help them in some way, pray for God to direct your thinking before acting. Sometimes we hurt people by trying to help them, especially if we try to take control of their situation. Conversely, you might be the angel that God is using for intervention. Use appropriate boundaries and lots of prayer.
2. Is the problem something that may happen in the future but not the only possible outcome? Where our attention goes, energy flows. Since we are energetic beings, doesn’t it make sense that we can affect the outcome if we shift our energy in relation to the matter? Focus on a different outcome, something more pleasing to you, and see if that doesn’t provide some clarity.
3. Trying to solve a problem can sometimes feel like holding back a waterfall. If we just let it go, it will settle itself once it runs its course.
4. Avoid negative input. Advice from others can be helpful but listening to people who often have their own troubles to overcome may not be the best source of advice. Seek guidance from people who are great problem-solvers, or who can see things in a more positive light.
5. Ask God, your guardian angels, the Universe, or whatever you identify with for help. If you give them the space, the answers will come, often in surprising ways.
6. Try to move your thinking in a more positive direction, and always consider what is the loving thing to do.
7. What others think of you is not your concern. Do your best in any situation and give yourself a break if you make a mistake. Don’t waste your energy worrying about what others might think of you because you really don’t know. What they think of you doesn’t change who you are.
8. Be flexible, be willing to compromise. The tree that will not bend in the wind is the tree that will break.
9. Get professional help if you must find a solution but the problem is outside of your expertise. Chances are, someone has successfully overcome a similar problem and can be a tremendous help in directing you. Be sure the solution resonates with you and gives you peace of mind before taking action.

Sometimes we perceive a problem where there may not be one at all. Here’s a really funny SNL skit with Stuart Smalley coaching Michael Jordan about accepting himself…(13) Daily Affirmation: Michael Jordan – SNL – YouTube