God’s Will or Free Will

Am I Doing God’s Will, or Am I Doing My Own Will?

My husband, David, was extraordinarily tapped in to God, Holy Spirit. I often asked them the question, How do we know if we’re doing God’s Will? I wanted to understand this more than anything. I knew this was the key to living a wonderful life, and our experiences with Holy Spirit for the 8 years before David passed in December 2020 demonstrated to us that there is nothing more amazing than having an all inclusive relationship with God. But they never really answered my question in a way that cleared it up for me. Perhaps they were, as they often did, letting me figure it out through my own experience. They did say this one thing about it; you don’t have as much free will as you think you do.  

At first, I was confused and disturbed by this. But as David and I leaned in to the experience we were having with Holy Spirit, it became comforting to us. David surrendered completely to God’s will. I was still having my own experiences, fumbling around with my emotional reactions, and letting the outside world have its way with me. I had my own inner guidance, my own Holy Spirit, but I usually went to David’s for answers. It was just easier that way. They often told me, You need to talk with your Holy Spirit.

Isn’t that usually the case? We go to others outside of ourselves for answers when God is right there within. That’s where the trouble begins. No one knows us as God does. No one outside of us has the same experiences that we do or shares the same perspectives. No one else can see the true consequences of our choices down the road, or which is the best option, path A, B, or C. Our decisions are based on our subconscious beliefs about who we are, what we deserve, and in most cases that we should be afraid of future outcomes. We are running on a faulty program and making erroneous judgments about the world around us from what we give our attention to, the news, our family and friends, Facebook, Twitter, and YouTube. So, who really is in charge here?   

They showed me that God’s will is free will.  I don’t want to get scriptural or anything but pay attention to this verse; Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding. In all your ways submit to Him and He will make your paths straight. Trust Holy Spirit, talk with them (pray), listen (meditate), and do what they say even if it goes against your programming. They know you, they know your situation, your needs and desires, and all possible outcomes. They can give you the best advice. You choose. But how do you know it’s them talking to you and not you? It just feels right.

I had believed in the Law of Attraction for decades, but it seemed to be contradictory to surrendering to God’s will. This really bothered me. It seemed that learning how to manipulate the laws of the universe to attract the things that we want is self-serving and not surrendering to God’s will. Are we really supposed to be selfish in that way? If I’m focused on me and what I want, that’s certainly not God’s will, is it?

Here’s where it gets tricky. You must ask yourself the big question; where did your desire come from?  If it’s fear-based or egoic, then it’s from your faulty programming. If it’s from a desire for expansion, for good, and it feels good in your heart, it’s a desire that came from God, from Source.  If we aren’t tuned in so that we can hear Holy Spirit, they can guide us through inspiration, through feelings, to where we need to go. We can still choose not to act on our inspiration. Perhaps we’re too busy, or too programmed in our routine to veer off course. We miss out on amazing experiences, even the fun of the little stuff happening all day long if we don’t pay attention to that inspiration. We stay stuck by not surrendering to God’s subtle will. If it’s important, they can create an overwhelming desire to do. It will feel good like it’s the right thing to do, and we will have a sense of well-being from it. Even if it goes against our logical thinking and it may seem irrational, we ignore the fear and go with it. We surrender our will to God. We still choose…free will. See?

A great example of doing God’s will is the 1989 movie Field of Dreams with Kevin Costner, Amy Madigan, and a host of other wonderful actors. If you hadn’t seen it yet, watch it.  If it’s been a while, watch it again. The main character, Ray Kinsella, an Iowa farmer, hears a voice in his head telling him “If you build it, he will come”. Ray gets a vision of a baseball field and turns down part of his corn crop to build it. With his supportive wife, Annie, Ray goes on a risky adventure, following the vague instructions of the voice, while the future of his farm looks dire. It’s a wonderful story about trusting God and knowing everything will be OK.