Step Five: Admitting Our Wrongs

Step Five – Admitted to Ourselves, to God, and to Another Human Being the Exact Nature of Our Wrongs

There is tremendous healing that occurs in Step Five. As we share our inventory list with another person, we strip ourselves bare of the things that have been hidden within us for so long. It’s as if we make a public confession to this one person, who represents the outer world to us, and we lose our fear of being found out. The secrets are out and can’t be held over us anymore. The mask that we had been wearing for so long served only to hide our true selves and now we can start living authentically. We feel a great weight lift off our shoulders with each admission as we read our inventory list. It takes courage to share this, maybe even more than when we wrote it.

In Step Five, we share our inventory list with another person, preferably a counselor or someone from the clergy that will simply sit with you, listen, and not judge. Someone that does not have an emotional connection with you is best, and someone who would never repeat what they hear.  You may find an Agape counselor or a counselor in a recovery program, that does Step Five sessions. A catholic priest might be an ideal option but may require that you be a member of the church for them to be able to help. Ask God to direct you. You’ll find what you need.

I did my Fifth Step with my husband, David. This isn’t recommended, but David was experienced with the Twelve Step work and was mentoring me through it as we both shared our inventories with each other. Some things were hard to share and others even harder to hear.  I can’t express enough how healing this step is. It takes a huge amount of courage to do this but as we go through the process, we become more willing to receive guidance and direction from God now that our ego has been broken down. We are able to participate in God’s will for us now that we’re out in the open where he can find us. Not that we were lost, but like Jonah, we can’t hide from God, nor do we want to.  While we expose our inventory, it’s as if we’re saying to another person and to God See Me, I’m Here!  We realize how silly it was to hide and now that we’re out in the open we realize we are safe. We are empowered and full of God’s Grace. We’ve shown the light on ourselves, and we discover that we are the light. We are free!

Step Six – Entirely Ready